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#BrokenRelationships; Because Our Feelings Are Important!

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img_6061We didn’t plan it; it just was the day we could all get together. It just so happened to be my late grandfather’s birthday. So it was ironic for my aunt and me to take my grandmother to The Museum of Broken Relationships on a day that would indefinitely remind us all of him.  My grandmother and grandfather got divorced after 30 years of marriage. She could arguably be the patron saint of broken relationships.  It was not a mutual decision.  I am sure that they both loved each other in their own flawed way up until the day he died. We recently found letters that my grandfather sent her. She wrote in-between his declaration of love; words that reminded her of why their relationship did not work. These are now destroyed.

Every relationship that ends leaves pieces that are difficult for many to let go of and some that are downright impossible to keep while starting a new relationship (I’m talking to you; women who keep stuffed teddy bears from exes).  People flock to Burning Man to burn things in effigy but if that is not your style, the Museum of Broken Relationships may be the answer.

The Museum is located in Los Angeles on Hollywood Boulevard. Not only do they display these past trophies of sentimental value, but they take donations and display the collection anonymously. Each display holds its own story. There were collections of mixed tapes, bras, and even an engagement ring.  One display (silicone breast implants) is a good reminder to never alter one’s body for someone else. Another of old cologne bottles, a painful reminder that some relationships are broken by death and not a mutual parting. A stuffed Betty Boop doll from a same-sex co-worker who received the gift from a crush. She knew that her crush was heterosexual and an intimate relationship would never work. 20160823_155315

So, if you have been holding on to the past and do not know where to start to let go, you can donate your memories to the museum. I have not had any bad breakups. The only thing I consider is a small stuffed dragon that I took when I moved from my mother’s home. My mom and I have never been close. I took the dragon in hopes that one day we could mend and have a meaningful mother and daughter relationships that are the scripts for movies. Alas, I have found that there are so many other relationships that mean more to me because of those willing to work together. My aunts, cousins, friends and anyone who invests time in a relationship. I still have that stuffed dragon, and know I should let it go.

One of the most  powerful donations is a tiny piece of paper with the words “Pay attention to me” written on it. It was donated by an artist who’s former girlfriend slipped him the piece of paper but he was too busy to look. It took him two years to find it. In a world of #Selfies, let us strive to love more often, forgive more often, and “pay attention” to those who matter the most.20160823_153551

Click The Museum of Broken Relationships for more information.

Thank you for reading,

-La Vida Verde

Je Suis Paris

By | Baby Jade, Blog, Uncategorized | No Comments

I was going to skip my blog in honor of those who lost their lives during today’s attacks, but then I remembered these words from Dumbledore and knew I had to say a little something.

“…the pain we all feel at this dreadful loss reminds me, reminds us, that while we may come from different places and speak in different tongues, our hearts beat as one.” – Albus Dumbledore
France needs humanity to reign. They need love, peace, & solidarity. Skip any political and/or religious agenda, & stand with Paris. It’s so easy during a tragic event to try and run your own personal agenda. It seems human nature as of late. But when something horrific like this, or the Turkey bombing, or Kenya school terror attacks happen we have to remember one thing first and foremost: people lost their lives. Forget who. Forget why. Just remember that there are families whose lives will never be the same because of the selfish acts of a few. Hate does not run this world, I truly believe that love does. The problem is with hate comes horrific acts. People who love don’t blow buildings or set off suicide bombs. We must find it in ourselves and by uniting with one another to always choose love. To condemn these acts and teach a message of love. How do you do that? By living love. By loving your neighbor as yourself. So many Parisians opened their homes to those fleeing the gruesome scenes of the attacks. THAT is how you live love. THAT is how you shut down terrorists and their plan to thwart light and love. Kill them with the ultimate kindness.

*Thank you for continuously reading my blogs. For more content check out my YouTube page: https://www.youtube.com/c/bethlehemawate*

Let’s connect on social media, I’d love to hear from you:

Twitter: https://twitter.com/bethlehemawate
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bethlehemawate
Snapchat: betu_la

Xo, B

30 in 30

By | Baby Jade, Blog, Uncategorized | No Comments

A month ago I turned the big 3-0! The thought of turning 30 initially scared the shit out of me, but then it hit me *duh* when you live life to the fullest, time will not phase you. It actually gets better with age, baby! Here then are 30 things I’ve learned in my 30 years of living.
1. Baggage is irrelevant. Don’t harbor it. Let it go.

2. Not everyone has your best interest at heart.

3. Stay simple-hearted.

4. Growing up happens, no matter what you do. Embrace it.

5. Your heart is stronger than you think, so love hard & love often.

6. Cow’s milk over breast milk. (I was a Similac baby)

7. Dream big! The bigger and more unattainable it seems the more on track you are to achieving everything.

8. Leave the nest. Before you’re married or settle down, move to another city for at least 2 years.

9. Travel often.

10. Write down everything. When you come back to journals written 5 years back, you’ll see just how much you’ve changed/grown.

11. Never hold back your emotions. If you want to cry, cry! Yell, scream, run in place, whatever.

12. Tell the people that matter how much you love them.

13. Be kind to everyone. It feels so good, why would you want to do anything else? Seriously.

14. Broaden your horizon by becoming knowledgeable about what is happening to your fellow man in other countries.

15. Do what you can to help those in need any way you can.

16. Find time in the day for you to reflect. Have a moment of peace/serenity.

17. Get a puppy. They make your day.

18. When it rains, dance in it.

19. Believe in magic.

20. Eat in moderation, but never deprive yourself. If you want a cupcake, eat a cupcake dammit!

21. High school drama doesn’t end in High school, but you can choose not play a part in it. Win.

22. Laughter truly is the best medicine.

23. To the ladies, your period isn’t a taboo subject, its life.

24. Go to Disneyland at least once. It’s the mecca of happiness.

25. Make your faith bigger than your fears.

26. Keep moving forward. Always move forward.

27. Never judge a book by it’s cover.

28. If people find you peculiar, that’s good!

29. Smiling never goes out of style.

30. Finally, life doesn’t come with instructions, therein lays the beauty of it.

*Thank you for continuously reading my blogs. For more content check out my YouTube page: https://www.youtube.com/c/bethlehemawate*

Let’s connect on social media, I’d love to hear from you:

Twitter: https://twitter.com/bethlehemawate
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bethlehemawate
Snapchat: betu_la

Xo, B


Bethlehem in the City…

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  1. an outgoing, overtly expressive person.

If you would have asked me six years ago, whether or not I considered myself an extrovert or introvert  it would have taken me .3 seconds to shout EXTROVERT from the tops of my lungs. Making a point, you know? Lately, though, I’ve had to really think about what I consider myself now days. As I scanned my brain for examples, I sadly started to accept that maybe I’d turned into an introvert over the years, and that thought bothered me.  For years I was known as the loud, rambunctious, girl who never knew when to SHUT UP! Teachers would always start parent-teacher conferences with “Bethlehem is a bright young lady but she has a tendency to talk, a lot.” One teacher, Mr. Doval, went as far as to say that I had “oral diarrhea”. Gross.

My parents would berate me for being so talkative but also beamed at the thought of me being a lawyer, because God knows; with a mouth like mine I could only be destined for big law talk. Please. I always knew what I wanted and where I wanted my so-called big mouth to take me. So when I moved to Los Angeles, and realized that talking to folks didn’t quite hold the same meaning as it did in Minneapolis, I started to hold back from talking to anyone; to the point that I just gave up talking to anyone at all. My journey was leading me into a downward spiral of being an anti-social bitch in the most awful way. I allowed myself to be bitter, to hold off on the quips and repartees that used to easily flow from my soul.

I blamed LA. This city with its unrealistic standards on beauty and the vanity, but this is LA, and I knew that coming in. Suddenly, I realized what the core source of this new found behavior had been. Me. I had allowed Los Angeles and all the intimidating factors it held stop me from being who I once was. No one stopped me. No one questioned me, yet I allowed it. Why? I didn’t understand it, but I had had enough! I wanted to break free from this introverted bitter bind that I now found myself in. So I started to let the guard that had crept up come down, I found myself talking to strangers more, being a lot more freeing with my thoughts and feelings and it felt great! Unfortunately, the bitchy part stayed. Guess that was always there 😉

It wasn’t easy, by any means, and I still have a ways to go but I’m finally starting to feel like I belong in this city and not like I just live here. The hunger that has risen while the shyness has diminished is reminiscent to that of me at 12 and that is the driving force for pushing through this city. It’s tough, I won’t lie but I’m not afraid anymore, and THAT is grand!

~ 11/5/13 Bethlehem Awate (aka: Baby Jade)

*Thank you for continuously reading my blogs. For more content check out my YouTube page: https://www.youtube.com/c/bethlehemawate*

Let’s connect on social media, I’d love to hear from you:

Twitter: https://twitter.com/bethlehemawate
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bethlehemawate
Snapchat: betu_la

Xo, B

Cul-de-Sac Conundrum…

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Over the weekend my “bestie” and I hosted a neighborhood block party. To our surprise, it was a tremendous turnout and of such community spirit, we can’t wait to have another one. Why is it that we are surround by so many special people of so much depth and breath to life, that we rarely take the time to extend ourselves? My “T” is one of those women whom you can’t help but to soak up her non-stop energy, get drunk in her creative juices, and melt into her mushy heart. She is my true definition of the Midwest and the truth behind the saying “home is where your heart is”. “T” is that person who shows her soul with the world, shares your tears and your smiles, sprinkles her love for life onto everything she touches, expresses gratitude in ways that make tears fall from your eyes, and gets excited about those “little things” that the bulk of my address book is too bored to swallow. Trust me, being a transplant from the Midwest is challenging enough because people aren’t sure how to register your way of the world. However, having a partner in crime to capture the essence of a city built on entertainment and relish in its often silly attitude, is priceless. Just like my family, she keeps me grounded and my soul fed. The world can be a cruel place if there’s not a filter surrounding you, reminding you of its beauty and to lift you up–especially if submerged in an industry surrounded by a lot of “noise”. My wish for everyone is to have a friend to aid as ear muffs, to keep you full of love and light, and without judgement like my “T”.

Now for the “NA-NU, NA-NU” and serendipitous story tale of how our adult lives merged. Apparently our friendship dates back to decades past, where my father and “T’s” father conducted business and we were the wee ones tugging on our fathers’ shirt tails in the office. “T’s” father has been my father’s accountant for the past 25 plus years in Indiana so we found out. Years ago tax time, our fathers put two and two together, their daughters had dually migrated Hoosier blood to So Cal and were “Valley Girls” at that. The conversation grew deeper and deeper and more bazaar coincidences surfaced. The DING-DING DING moment was my father asking her father “Is your daughter a stunt woman by chance?” and her father asking my father ” Is your daughter in public relations and fashion?”… “Yes”….”Yes” they both said. Our fathers had determined we were literally next door neighbors, though “T” and I had already formed the most fabulous of friendship without even knowing our history. WEIRD, right? That was no accident. What is the likelihood of two friends stuck like glue who move into the same cul-de-sac, whose husbands play basketball together 3x a week (sidebar: we swear they hold hands on the way to the gym), friends all get along like peas and carrots, and love one another like family, to meet later in life and of such a “Butterfly Effect”? To have happenstance such as this and to have our friendship and families linked as we are, there is no doubt in my mind that things absolutely happen for a reason. I’m a believer!!! Happenstance makes for many heartstrings and we are far more connected than we are able to even wrap our heads around. Life IS beautiful like that. Amazeballs actually…

This year we lost a mutual dear friend to a job in the South. She’s what we used to call the new school version of yesteryear’s “Welcome Wagon”. Every time a resident had big news, needed help, or cause for a celebration, “R” was the one-stop shop for spreading the word and making things happen. From Christmas Caroling, welcoming new neighbors, Neighborhood Watch, or congratulating new births, “T” and I have had some monstrous shoes to fill to say the least. There’s no way we can be what “R” was to this community, but we attempted a spin-off version of her. A block party isn’t a block party without a neighborhood’s help, period. This past Sunday, we saw all sorts of new neighbors in the mix and realized community comes down to connecting the dots. People will make time if you help with the push. There were married couples, singles, elderly, moms, dads, single parents, and kids who hung out for four hours plus. We rocked out to a 70’s cover band, bounce house, free-flowing booze, and feasted on the most amazing pot luck spread I’ve ever seen. Gourmet a GO-GO!

Our neighbors went ALL OUT and so did my “T” with her “Witches Brew” and Halloween set up. Seeing as she has two kids under the age of two at home and had just come back from an art fair the day before where she was selling her homemade soy candles, “T” really is one of those mom’s who can DO IT ALL and DOES. Full of color and a modern-day version of Rainbow Brite, there wasn’t anything she hadn’t thought of. Most people would’ve fallen apart if their co-host had come down with a 24 hour bug the day of an event. Not my “T”…she blazed through the fire of making sure everything was on point and filled in the blanks as if she’d written the script ahead of time. I on the other hand, could barely get my Buffalo Chicken sliders out for showtime. Perrier was my salvation and so was my “T”. The hubby was pretty great, too. A bit of a knight in not so shiny armor, but rather Puma sweats I might say…he definitely got a dose of “Sister Wives” that day. Lots of requests from multiple women and a longer “Honey DO” list than usual.

In this life and as we add candles to the cake, it is times like these where you realize the importance of sitting back, putting your feet up, marinating your friendships, and taking the initiative to go out of your way to integrate your community. So much can be celebrated and learned from those around you. Friendship circles can grow bigger, BBQs can become more fun, and to your surprise you just may stumble into a new friend of commonality or shared street name. So today I salute my fellow Midwesterner, friends, family, and business partner who share these same values. I love my cul-de-sac, even though I always swore the suburbs would be the death of me back in the day. It’s funny how the years have frayed that viewpoint. Friendships grow where there is life and we all are very much alive. Open your doors, open your hearts, and take a chance on your community. Happy accidents to all and may you bounce in similar blessings…